Trial and Error

It was 9 years ago next month that Barry & I learned that we were finally going to be parents. We were thrilled, excited and a bit nervous. The fact that who I am has such an effect on an innocent little person scares me. I'm afraid of messing up and having an adult child who is not a brilliant, successful and socially appropriate individual who gives back to society. It seems overwhelming when I really think about it. I have so much to do, so much to expose him to. Yet I feel like I need an eraser of so many memories. He's my trial and error child. I try my hardest and sometimes it works. Sometimes everything is just perfect. However lately it seems that I just can't get through to him. I mean really Braeden, does pulling your sleeping brother out of bed sound like a nice wake up? Is it so hard to study for your school work?

I know how he is. He's used to things coming naturally and unless he's vested in it he won't give it any effort. He does what he wants to do and when he wants to do it. He tests all authority and will keep you on your toes. He's a CONTROL FREAK! He's outwardly arrogant but inwardly a bit unsure of himself. He's kind. He's strong willed. He has a heart of gold. He has a general desire to please when it suits him. He hasn't quite figured out how to play the game of life. He gets caught up in his feelings and can't manipulate the situation to his liking very effectively. He's challenging and he's STUBBORN!! He's sweet and loving. He's an attention seeker. He's respectful. He's a helper and a worker. He has a lot of pride. He's a cuddler who still likes to be babied. He's my first born and holds my heart in his palms. I have a pretty good idea of what he's like because he's just like me.

Yes, I admit it, the things that drive me absolutely nuts are things that I did/do/have done. I do see a lot of Barry in him but that determined and vibrant child acts eerily similar to me when I was a child. I just wasn't that bad but who knows-maybe if I had 3 younger siblings I'd be as ornery as he is!

I wish that Princeton Medical Center had given me a handbook titled "How to Raise Well Adjusted Kids and Not Lose Your Mind." I don't know all the answers but I do know that I pray for guidance daily and try my best to understand my little boy. He's my challenge but he's worth it.

HOLA!

So I sit here with Brooklyn on my lap ready to try and record the events of our very busy lives. Notice I said very busy? Well it's sad but true so if I don't post please forgive me as I am probably stuck in my minivan shuttling the kids around! Why you may ask I would want to take on ONE MORE thing and actually blog? Well I just can't seem to find the time to scrapbook so I figure if I record here what happens I'll be able to remember later on. Hopefully!



So here's a quick recap of us:

Barry, my full time love but part time husband as he is always on the go traveling all over the country doing his best to further his career and support our family. He's the BEST DAD EVER!



Braeden, our strong willed 1st born who has a heart of gold. He's in 2nd grade and is the best big brother to the babies. He's a love. He can be a stinker yet so sweet. He's naturally athletic and LOVES soccer, specifically being Goalie. He's my big guy!



Ethan, My green eyed 2nd born who is the perfect little brother. By perfect he looks up to his big bro but manages to play the pesky little brother perfectly. He is also my observer, you may think he's not paying attention but he actually is. He's my mini me.



Gavin, he is my blond tasmanian devil, my Dennis the Menace & my sweet boy. If he had been 1st we would have only had 1. He's deep in the terrible 2s stage. Phew, this boy exhausts me! But oh how I LOVE him!



Brooklyn, my sweet baby girl. She is my girly. She is beautiful, smiley and such a Momma's girl. I'm trying to enjoy every minute of her since she is our last baby and seems to be growing to fast. She is cuddly and sweet yet she is beginning to show her fiestyness. We are in trouble!!



Me, well you know who I am, I'm working full time, running my kids all over the place and trying to be supermom. Sometimes I succeed and sometimes I don't but I try with all my heart and soul to be the best wife, mom, daughter and friend. I have an amazingly strong support system which helps out a ton.



So that's a quick description of us. Our life with 4 is busy and crazy yet I wouldn't want it any other way. We are very blessed and honored that God trusts us enough to loan us these beautiful children.