Almost Spring Break!

Oh my. This month has been crazy. If I stop to think about all we do I think I'd be overwhelmed. I'm simply following the Dory school of thought...."just keep swimming" LOL! It's how I get through it all.

Onto the kids......I am really enjoying my 2 little ones. They are fun. They keep us busy but oh so fun. The 14 mos apart is really my favorite spacing of all. Brooklyn's latest is she loves her "hatillas" Yup tortillas. The girl is definitely mine! I also love how whenever she wants something she says "Mommy you buy me Awiel nightgown?" or "My Daddy needs to buy me hatillas and leche" She cracks me up! Gavin is actually mellowing out a bit. I hope it's because they are all growing up more. I can't wait for the days of family vacations with 4 older children!

On Friday I went to Legoland with just Ethan. It was so much fun! I really enjoy getting away with just one kid. Such quality time. I'm thinking of setting up dates with the kids. 1:1 time. Maybe a dinner, or movie or even an activity. I hope our schedule slows down enough we can do that. If I do it right we can have 1:1 time with each kid on an everyother week basis.

As for me, trying to be able to run longer and faster. This training really is work! Fun but work. I ordered a cocktail of supplements from a friend who owns a vitamin shop to help me with endurance and weight loss. I hope it works!! I need some help, lol!

So we're going to Yosemite for a few days over spring break..........so excited to get some family time in! Hope to visit with our Bay Area family too :)

Just another day

So Barry forgot Gavin's parent teacher conference. As a teacher I KNOW what is going through Miss Desi's mind. "freakin parents can't get their crap together and poor Gavin suffers" Yeah, that's what I think sometimes. But it is a Christian preschool so she probably just prayed for us, lol. Yup, I feel like a crappy parent. Sometimes life gets in the way. UGH. So I get home and again, Barry has more work to do so I take the little ones to swimming. They're fine. I'm a bit irrtated that I have to take them and not Barry as I had planned. Oh well. I'm on my way home and ready to go to Ash Wednesday Mass. But since the timing of swimming lessons ran to close to 6pm Mass I missed it. We missed it. I'm again feeling crappy. Gotta love Catholic guilt. I know it's not a Holy day of obligation but I really wanted to go. Why oh why can't I get it together? I get home, cook the dream dinners meal I had defrosted, call the family to eat. Wait what? They've already eaten. Yeah, they were expecting to go to church so when I was at swimming with the kids Barry fed them. Is this day over YET? So I decide to unwind with yoga, sounds fantastic right? Well as I was getting into downward dog my own big 110 lb dog does his own stretch, yawns and gives me a nice wet kiss. Ick. Then he lays right next to my mat. All the while Brooklyn is doing the poses with me. At one point I was trapped on my mat. Brooklyn is glued to me, Fritz is on the other side and overtaking my mat. While I'm focusing on my breathing Brooklyn keeps asking while she is 2 inches from my face "Mommy you do esercise?" Yup, I started laughing and gave up. This is definitely a Calgon day! just 2 more days until Friday...........

4 day weekend

Thank You President Lincoln and President Washington for allowing us to have a 4 day weekend. As a teacher I really NEED these 4 days!

Lots has happened in 1 month. I finished my 1st half marathon. It was crazy. I thought I was going to cry at mile 9 and 10! But despite walking for over 1 year I really wasn't prepared as I should have been. Plus I got a blood blister on the BOTTOM of my foot. Yeah that was fun. NOT! So I decided that from now on all things I do need to have some purpose. When I grow up I want to work with some philanthropic companies. So I decided to kill 2 birds with 1 stone. I want to train, really train for another 1/2 marathon. I also want to raise some money. So I've joined team in training. I raise $2200 for the LLS. Excited and nervous are a few feelings I'm experiencing right now!

Other than that, we're just busy. Still really struggling with our great loss. Not a day goes by that I don't think of Sherry, Christopher and Macy. Sherry was barely 38. I'm her same age right now. The thought of dying along with my first born and youngest is just incomprehensible. It scares me. I'm frequently in the car with all my kids just as she was. That scares me. Life is just so fragile. Barry is still not coping well. Really, how do you? A loss this big will always be felt, we're just trying to get through the days. I frequently play the songs from the slide show. The words from "Homesick" really speak to me. So many verses feel as if they're taken right out of my thoughts.

You're in a better place, I've heard a thousand times

And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you

But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry Is how long must I wait to be with you

I close my eyes and I see your face

If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place

Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now

Help me Lord cause I don't understand your ways

The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know

But, even if you showed me, the hurt would be the same

Cause I'm still here so far away from home

I close my eyes and I see your face

If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place

Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now

In Christ, there are no goodbyes

And in Christ, there is no end

So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have

To see you again

To see you again

And I close my eyes and I see your face

If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place

Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now

Miss those 3 dearly. I think I'm mostly missing what was to come. Christopher going to college, getting married and having kids we could love on. Sherry and us were just beginning to be able to get together more. We were planning on more vacations together. Macy, sweet Macy was just 5. Her whole life. I'm mourning all of that more than anything.

Where of where has the time gone?

So clearly this wasn't at the top of my to do list. I tried, I did but clearly wasn't successful. Anyway, I suppose I'll update ya'll again. (blame Barry for that Ya'll!)

Hmmm........

Braeden is now almost 10. He's 5 feet tall and wears a size 7.5 shoe! Fourth grade and oh so inquisitive. LOVE him! He has learned to not argue with us as much yet hasn't lost his fire. still active in sports and my biggest help. Heart of gold.

Ethan hasn't changed much. He's missing his top 2 front teeth and it's super cute. HE's doing GREAT in school. His conferences are so chill. Mellow. Just like him.

Gavin is still a WILD CHILD!!! My biggest Momma's boy yet he gives me all my gray hairs! Sitches, staples, cuts, bruises and fat lips are all part of him. He's still blondy with blue eyes and looks just like Barry. I look like his nanny. He's such a doll, adorable, sweet and my love.

Brooklyn, my love. My girl. Oh how I adore her. She's spirited, sweet, fiesty, kind and pure Girly!! She matches her clothes, her shoes, her bows and looks like a little Princess all while hitting her brothers. She holds her own. She is my shadow. Wherever I go, she follows. I LOVE it. She's growing up way to fast.

Barry and I are still the same, working, running around, balancing work, kids, life and family. We're good. Trying to enjoy the kids' childhoods while still finding time for ourselves.

As for me, well I'm procrastinating, I should be doing homework.

And Brooklyn just fell.

Trial and Error

It was 9 years ago next month that Barry & I learned that we were finally going to be parents. We were thrilled, excited and a bit nervous. The fact that who I am has such an effect on an innocent little person scares me. I'm afraid of messing up and having an adult child who is not a brilliant, successful and socially appropriate individual who gives back to society. It seems overwhelming when I really think about it. I have so much to do, so much to expose him to. Yet I feel like I need an eraser of so many memories. He's my trial and error child. I try my hardest and sometimes it works. Sometimes everything is just perfect. However lately it seems that I just can't get through to him. I mean really Braeden, does pulling your sleeping brother out of bed sound like a nice wake up? Is it so hard to study for your school work?

I know how he is. He's used to things coming naturally and unless he's vested in it he won't give it any effort. He does what he wants to do and when he wants to do it. He tests all authority and will keep you on your toes. He's a CONTROL FREAK! He's outwardly arrogant but inwardly a bit unsure of himself. He's kind. He's strong willed. He has a heart of gold. He has a general desire to please when it suits him. He hasn't quite figured out how to play the game of life. He gets caught up in his feelings and can't manipulate the situation to his liking very effectively. He's challenging and he's STUBBORN!! He's sweet and loving. He's an attention seeker. He's respectful. He's a helper and a worker. He has a lot of pride. He's a cuddler who still likes to be babied. He's my first born and holds my heart in his palms. I have a pretty good idea of what he's like because he's just like me.

Yes, I admit it, the things that drive me absolutely nuts are things that I did/do/have done. I do see a lot of Barry in him but that determined and vibrant child acts eerily similar to me when I was a child. I just wasn't that bad but who knows-maybe if I had 3 younger siblings I'd be as ornery as he is!

I wish that Princeton Medical Center had given me a handbook titled "How to Raise Well Adjusted Kids and Not Lose Your Mind." I don't know all the answers but I do know that I pray for guidance daily and try my best to understand my little boy. He's my challenge but he's worth it.

HOLA!

So I sit here with Brooklyn on my lap ready to try and record the events of our very busy lives. Notice I said very busy? Well it's sad but true so if I don't post please forgive me as I am probably stuck in my minivan shuttling the kids around! Why you may ask I would want to take on ONE MORE thing and actually blog? Well I just can't seem to find the time to scrapbook so I figure if I record here what happens I'll be able to remember later on. Hopefully!



So here's a quick recap of us:

Barry, my full time love but part time husband as he is always on the go traveling all over the country doing his best to further his career and support our family. He's the BEST DAD EVER!



Braeden, our strong willed 1st born who has a heart of gold. He's in 2nd grade and is the best big brother to the babies. He's a love. He can be a stinker yet so sweet. He's naturally athletic and LOVES soccer, specifically being Goalie. He's my big guy!



Ethan, My green eyed 2nd born who is the perfect little brother. By perfect he looks up to his big bro but manages to play the pesky little brother perfectly. He is also my observer, you may think he's not paying attention but he actually is. He's my mini me.



Gavin, he is my blond tasmanian devil, my Dennis the Menace & my sweet boy. If he had been 1st we would have only had 1. He's deep in the terrible 2s stage. Phew, this boy exhausts me! But oh how I LOVE him!



Brooklyn, my sweet baby girl. She is my girly. She is beautiful, smiley and such a Momma's girl. I'm trying to enjoy every minute of her since she is our last baby and seems to be growing to fast. She is cuddly and sweet yet she is beginning to show her fiestyness. We are in trouble!!



Me, well you know who I am, I'm working full time, running my kids all over the place and trying to be supermom. Sometimes I succeed and sometimes I don't but I try with all my heart and soul to be the best wife, mom, daughter and friend. I have an amazingly strong support system which helps out a ton.



So that's a quick description of us. Our life with 4 is busy and crazy yet I wouldn't want it any other way. We are very blessed and honored that God trusts us enough to loan us these beautiful children.